Who am I?
I asked as I sat
This mind-voice always there still chattering away
This imposter inside
Posing as my true self
So I asked this voice – who are you and from were do you arise?
Suddenly, I envisioned a mini-me in the middle of a huge room
space on space
A room bare except for tiled walls
floor creamy white. smooth
voice shouting from mini-me
“Who am I” over and over again
echos bounce against the cold hard walls
Mini-me shrinks to a walnut lump on the floor
Only to disappear in a ‘puff’ of….. wind?
In that very moment, something expanded
Was it me?
Weird expansive non-feelings
And everything in me
Just a moment or two
Laughing out loud
Joy coursing through me,
Through to the core
This raucous laughter shocked me
So loud and repetitive and
coming from me sitting here
in my living room
Not like I laugh, ever
Eyes opening with surprise
First written 14th July 2011 after mediation
Pic: gift of orchids received 9th Dec
Rewritten for publication Dec 10th 2012